Pre-menstrual-syndrome causes depression

"GERALDINE'S STORY" - Geraldine is a 33 year-old mother of three who works as a nursing auxiliary. She has had pre-menstrual-syndrome since after the birth of her third baby.

She had severe symptoms in all four categories. She felt 'possessed' pre-menstrually and hardly recognised herself. She was withdrawn from life and disgusted with her own behaviour. Her eating habits were particularly erratic pre-menstrually. In particular she craved chocolate, which she felt immensely guilty about.

I thought sometimes I could just sit zombie-like and not talk to anybody. I wanted to go to the doctor and ask him to take my children and put me in a white jacket and stick me in a room somewhere. In fact, it even makes me bad talking about it.

POST-NATAL DEPRESSION - When my third child was three months old I suddenly developed post-natal depression. It hit me really hard as I had never experienced it before. I didn't feel aggressive towards the baby. I just knew there was something wrong with me. I used to sit staring into space for hours. There were jobs that needed doing and the whole house was disintegrating, but I just couldn't do anything. I felt awful all the time and I had no energy or enthusiasm. I was overweight and depressed.

My doctor prescribed anti-depressants. I don't know if they helped or not. They helped me to sleep, but I was afraid I wouldn't wake up. They made me feel zombie-like.

I realised I had pre-menstrual-syndrome during a sticky patch in my marriage. I felt I was reacting to everything and that some problem had to be present in order to make me feel so bad.

BLACK COULD OVERHEAD - Whereas I hadn't felt aggressive with post-natal depression. I felt absolutely horrendous when I had pre-menstrual-syndrome. I used to feel I had an individual black could hanging over me. I'd wake up in the morning knowing that awful feeling was there and that there was nothing I could do to make it go away. I just knew I had days ahead of me feeling so awful.

I didn't want to participate in my usual activities pre-menstrually. I belong to an amateur dramatics society, but I just didn't feel I could do anything like that. You need to give a lot of yourself in things like that, and I didn't feel capable of doing what I was supposed to do. My memory just went, and I would literally go blank, and that applied to everything, not just my drama.

I felt like a zombie and wanted to withdraw from life. I was disgusted with my behaviour towards the children, who, as a result, are quite afraid of me. To compensate I'd then eat vast quantities of chocolate for comfort which would only serve to make my symptoms worse.

I often found myself hiding away to eat in private. I found the amount I was eating an embarrassment. If you fancy a bar of chocolate you go off and buy one and that's fine. But I could eat four or five bars at once, and then eat the same amount again. You can't get rid of that many sweet papers. So you gradually ease them out of your pocket, or wrap them in something else, and throw them in the bin. The children would notice I'd had more than one bar, I couldn't pull the wool over their eyes. I wasn't aware that I was being silly at the time, I just used to sit and eat and then feel so sick afterwards.

I knew I wouldn't do any housework in the days to come, and that I wouldn't want to do anything with the children. I would be unbearable to my husband and I wouldn't bother to cook.

My doctor again prescribed anti-depressants. But knowing they made me feel zombie-like, I didn't want to take them any more. I was also prescribed diuretics. Unfortunately they seemed to stop my bladder working properly, because I couldn't make it to the loo in time. So they were really out anyway.

I also tried vitamin B6, evening primrose oil, multi-vitamins, ginseng and progesterone pessaries.

At the time I felt life wasn't really worth living. I existed from situation to situation. It was a very stressful time. I had one good week in four. It was unbearable for the family, it was really horrible. I thought I was going round the bend, totally insane and that no one could help me at all. I didn't really know who to contact as I'd tried all my doctor had to offer. I then read about nutritional supplements and how they were helping pre-menstrual-syndrome.

One of Geraldine's particular weakness was her craving for sweet food pre-menstrually and her excessive indulgence. I now know that chocolate makes me depressed and of course I put on weight if I eat rubbish.

END RESULT - Since I've been using nutritional supplements I feel so much better. My children notice the difference in me, I am no longer nasty to them. It has made me feel so much better in myself. I personally feel fine, although I could still do with losing weight.

I still have my marital problems. But I know that we have got things wrong marriage-wise, I know they are not related to pre-menstrual-syndrome. I haven't got that aggressiveness inside me so much and I haven't got that awful feeling, that black cloud hanging over my head. That was the worst thing.

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